Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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