Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
