stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
