i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
