dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
