I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
the day after is always just damage control
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
