I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
