Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
