On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
