I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
