If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
