There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
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