its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
