she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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