By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
