Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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