Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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