How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
