He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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