Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
