when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
