it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
