I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
