goodnight i made you a song goodbye
People in love make me want to vomit
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I AM VODKA MAN
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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