forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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