living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
