best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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