she smelled like a LAN party
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm bleeding and have questions
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
