you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Also, beer. Big fan.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
