Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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