They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Randomize
