Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize