There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
