Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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