Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
