so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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