He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
