he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i drank out of a bidet.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He? As in you personified your dick?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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