At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
