Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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