how hairy? two words: wookie tits
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
