And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize