If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
