Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We talked him into tasing himself.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
