Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
