38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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