Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
