I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Randomize
