were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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