Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
